Episode 11

MARCUS is walking across the yard, going to class.

MARCUS thinks - I gotta remember to thank Buck for emailing me that information about Omega Psi Phi. He really didn't have to do that. He is mad cool.

(MARCUS is early for his class so he is casually walking across the yard.)

MARCUS thinks - I gotta get to know that stuff too!

(MARCUS looks across the yard and sees both KENNY and FRANK sitting on the wall, talking.

MARCUS thinks - Oh shit! The Omegas! I need to go speak to them!

(He looks at the time on his cell phone.)

MARCUS thinks - I've got about fifteen minutes.

(MARCUS changes direction and starts to walk toward KENNY and BRUCE.)

MARCUS thinks - Just don't say anything stupid!

KENNY - Yeah bruh, you know what I'm sayin'?

FRANK - Roo roo bruh. I know I know. If I was you bruh, I'd have to be out.

KENNY - Oh you know that dog, I'm always out.

MARCUS - Good afternoon.

(silence)

(KENNY and FRANK look up and shield their eyes from the sunshine. The both look up at MARCUS.)

KENNY - Who are you?
MARCUS - I'm Marcus. I met you at the interest meeting a few months ago.

KENNY - Oh okay. Marcus huh?
MARCUS - Yes. And you're Frank right?

(KENNY looks at FRANK.)

KENNY - Yeah, I'm Frank. And this is my bruh Kenny.

FRANK - What's up dude.

MARCUS - Hello Kenny.

(KENNY laughs.)

MARCUS - So how are classes coming?

(KENNY looks at FRANK and smiles.)

KENNY - Classes are fine Marcus. Listen Marcus, remember when you met us, we told you that it was important to get to know the bruhs on the yard?

MARCUS - Yes.

KENNY - Did you pay attention to that?
MARCUS - Oh yes, I did.

KENNY - Good. So then you can tell me a little something about myself?
MARCUS - Yes I can.

(MARCUS stands confidently. KENNY looks at FRANK and smiles, then looks back at MARCUS.)

KENNY - Okay Marcus. Tell ya what. Why don't you tell me four things about me. And why did I choose the number four?
MARCUS - Because Frank, you have four founders.

KENNY - Right. So tell me four things about myself.

MARCUS - Well, you're from St. Louis.

KENNY - Uh huh.

MARCUS - And you're a sociology major.

KENNY - Right.

MARCUS - And uh...uh..

KENNY - Well my name is...

MARCUS - Frank.

KENNY - Right. That's three things, and one more.

MARCUS - Uh, you're a member of Omega Psi Phi Fraternity incorporated.

KENNY - Good. Four things. Now how about Kenny.

(MARCUS turns toward FRANK.)

MARCUS - Well your name is Kenny.

(FRANK is silent.)

MARCUS - And you're a member of Omega Psi Phi Fraternity incorporated.

FRANK - Well that's true.

MARCUS - I think you are a chemistry major.

FRANK - Right.

MARCUS - And this is your second year as a member of Omega Psi Phi Fraternity incorporated. Frank on the other hand pledged last year.

(MARCUS gestures toward KENNY.)

(silence)

FRANK - Dude...

(FRANK doesn't even acknowledge MARCUS by looking at him. Instead he turns away as he speaks.)

FRANK - ...man you will never become a bruh on this campus!

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CALVIN holds the door open for GWEN. She steps out of his car. He quickly takes off his jacket and covers her head with it. It's lightly starting to drizzle.

GWENDOLYN - Thank you.

CALVIN - No problem. I didn't know it was supposed to rain today. I would've had an umbrella for you.

GWENDOLYN - That's okay. You never can tell nowadays. One minute it's real nice outside, the next minute thunderstorm, the next minute real nice again.

(CALVIN leads GWEN into Pharoahs. They are there for the happy hour.)

CALVIN - Oh good. It's not that crowded. Let's sit over here.

GWENDOLYN - Okay cool.

(They find a booth and sit down.)

CALVIN - I wanna thank you for having lunch with me. I know it was short notice.

GWENDOLYN - You thanked me already. And please don't thank me again for helping you in class. Ha ha ha ha ha.

(CALVIN smiles.)

CALVIN - Okay okay, I'll lay off. I just show appreciation well.

GWENDOLYN - That may come in handy. That's a good habit to have.

(GWENDOLYN smiles as a waitress comes over.)

WAITRESS - Hello and welcome to Pharoahs. Anything to drink?

GWENDOLYN - Yeah, water is fine for me.

CALVIN - Hi. Let me get a Sprite.

WAITRESS - Okay.

CALVIN - And can we order the wings now?

WAITRESS - Sure. Small or a large order?
CALVIN - Large. You may have to keep em coming.

WAITRESS - Sure.

CALVIN - It's usually more crowded then this up in here.

GWENDOLYN - I think it's cool that they have a happy hour that students can come to. You know, no alcohol.

CALVIN - You don't drink?

GWENDOLYN - Naw.

CALVIN - Yeah, me neither.

(CALVIN tries to hide his grin.)

GWENDOLYN - Boy please. You drink! Ha ha ha ha ha.

CALVIN - Yeah, I do. Ha ha ha. But just beer. I don't like liquor.

GWENDOLYN - Yeah, that's cool. So you don't be falling down drunk?
CALVIN - Oh no. I really only got drunk once. I was in high school. We were going on some field trip and I was on the back of the bus.

GWENDOLYN - Uh huh.

CALVIN - So me and my stupid little friends decided to all smuggle six packs in our backpacks. Now mind you, none of us had ever drank before. We just acted like we did. So we didn't know our limit.

GWENDOLYN - Ha ha ha ha, okay.

CALVIN - So we get back there and we're tossin' em up. I mean just drinking, and laughing. Like it's soda.

GWENDOLYN - Ha ha ha ha ha.

CALVIN - So then I'm thinking, oh this aint nothing! I don't even feel it! I probably had already had four straight beers.

GWENDOLYN - So then what happened?
CALVIN - Well everything was fine and everybody was okay until the bus stopped and it was time to get off. I stood up and the bus started to move.

GWENDOLYN - It was still being driven?
CALVIN - No! That's the point! The driver got off but the bus was moving left and right so bad, I tried to walk but couldn't get my bearing. I was so scared! Do here's the crazy part.

GWENDOLYN - Uh huh.

CALVIN - We somehow get off the bus and we're all feeling the same way and we had to line up. So all the guys are in the back lined up with the class and the guy is in front giving us instructions on what we would be doing today and I feel it all coming up.

GWENDOLYN - Oh no!

CALVIN - And it's coming up fast! I look over at my friends, and they don't look too good either! So I don't know what to do and in the very next second, I start to throw up all over the girl standing in front of me. All in the back of her hair!
GWENDOLYN - Oh my God!

(The waitress brings the water and Sprite and set it on the table.)

CALVIN - But that isn't the worst part! For some odd reason, I thought...if I can just suck this stuff back in, nobody will know that I threw up and I won't get in trouble!

GWENDOLYN - No!

CALVIN - So as I throw up on her and she realizes what's going on and screams, I am steady trying to lick her hair to suck back all of my throw up!

GWENDOLYN - Eeeeeeeeeeeew yuck!

CALVIN - All my boys started to throw up. But at least they had the sense to turn around or face the ground or something. Everybody started running and screaming. The girl in front of me had a fit. It was a mess! We were on detention until last week!

GWENDOLYN - Ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha! Oh my goodness!

CALVIN - It took me a long time to ever drink again. But I swore I would never get waisted. The minute I feel something strange, that's it for the kid.

GWENDOLYN - Ha ha ha ha, well with that story I know you've learned your lesson! Ha ha ha ha ha!

CALVIN - I know that's right! Ha ha ha ha!

(CALVIN grabs his Sprite and GWENDOLYN grabs her purse. She pulls out some pills and takes one out. She throws it in her mouth and drinks some water behind it.)

CALVIN - Hey. What's that pill for?

(silence)

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MARCUS is talking to KENNY and FRANK on the yard.

MARCUS - This is your second year as a member of Omega Psi Phi Fraternity incorporated. Frank on the other hand pledged last year.

(MARCUS gestures toward KENNY.)

(silence)

FRANK - Dude...

(FRANK doesn't even acknowledge MARCUS by looking at him. Instead he turns away as he speaks.)

FRANK - ...man you will never become a bruh on this campus.

MARCUS - Wha...

FRANK - My name aint damn Kenny! I'm Frank! And I pledged this year!

MARCUS - You're...you're Frank?

(KENNY is laughing.)

FRANK - Get the hell out of here Marcus!

MARCUS - But...

FRANK - I said go!

(MARCUS takes the obvious hint and turns to walk away.)

MARCUS thinks - Damn! Damn! Damn! Damn! Shit!

(MARCUS looks up at the clock tower and realizes he is five minutes late for his class.)

MARCUS thinks - Dammit!

(His cell phone rings. He has walked away from KENNY and FRANK so he answers it.)

RASHIM - Marc! Where the hell you been man?
MARCUS - What are you talkin' about man?

RASHIM - I been lookin' for you! I got something to tell you!
MARCUS - Well it's gonna have to wait. I was talking to Frank and Kenny, and I made a fool out of myself and now I'm late for class!

RASHIM - Frank and Kenny the Ques?
MARCUS - No, Frank and Kenny the AKAs. Of course the Ques man!

RASHIM - Damn, what did you say?

MARCUS - I was calling Frank Kenny and Kenny Frank and looking real stupid!

RASHIM - Shit man!

MARCUS - And now they got me late for class. So I gotta go.

RASHIM - Well, sorry to rain on your already stormy day, but I got some more news for you.

MARCUS - What? More bad news?

RASHIM - Wait til you hear this! Remember Renee? That girl that you were diggin' who is an AKA?
MARCUS - Yeah. Is there more drama about her?

RASHIM - No, less drama!

MARCUS - Huh?

RASHIM - Man, turns out she isn't what we think about her. She's not messin' around with any guys. That girl that told you that about her was lying.

MARCUS - What?
RASHIM - Yeah man, she's legit. And you brushed her off.

MARCUS - Wait a minute, how do you know this?
RASHIM - That's what I've been tryin to call you and tell you. I ran into Tracey on the yard.

MARCUS - Her soror?
RASHIM - Yeah, and she told me that...

MARCUS - Dude, of course she's gonna say that. That's her girl. Her soror.

RASHIM - Listen man, I'm tellin ya. She's tellin the truth. I can tell she is.

MARCUS - What? How do you know?
RASHIM - Because I'm a good judge of character and I can tell when a woman is lying to me.

MARCUS - What! Ha ha ha ha ha! Nigga please!

RASHIM - Aight aight, so a few girls got over on a nigga. But still. She was telling the truth man. Plus, you listened to her other soror, so why shouldn't we give this one the benefit of the doubt?

MARCUS - Good point.

(silence)

RASHIM - What's the girl's name that told you that shit about Renee?
MARCUS - Ummmm...

(MARCUS is trying to remember.)

MARCUS - Uh...

RASHIM - You don't remember? Come on man, what's her name?

(MARCUS arrives at the door of his classroom.)

MARCUS - I gotta go man. Class already started.

RASHIM - Aight man. Well I'll holla at cha...

MARCUS - Ramona!

RASHIM - Huh?
MARCUS - That was that girl's name! It was Ramona or something! She was an AKA from Ahpla U.

RASHIM - Cool. That's all I needed to know!

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JESSICA and AISHA are eating lunch together in the cafeteria.

AISHA - I'm tryin' to tell you it was a straight act of God!

JESSICA - Wait, wait, let me get this straight!

(JESSICA is talking and laughing between bites of her food.)

JESSICA - You had a real bad toothache...

AISHA - Real bad is putting it lightly. I'm talking about a root canal. Girl that pain is out of this world.

JESSICA - So you have this root canal pain and you're trying to study.

AISHA - Yeah.

JESSICA - You've taken how many pain killers?
AISHA - Like five or something. Straight! So now I can't keep my eyes open but I know I had to study for this mid term.

JESSICA - So tell me the next part again.

AISHA - So I get on my knees and start praying. And I say Lord, you know I am going through some serious pain. And you know I can't stay up and study for this. But you know I have to pass. Now I'm not gonna be greedy and ask for an A. I'm not even gonna ask for a B. I just need to pass. Please Lord, just let me pass.

JESSICA - Then you went to sleep?
AISHA - The medicine knocked me out.

JESSICA - You wake up the next day...

AISHA - I get up, I go to class, I take the mid term, I pass.

JESSICA - And you hadn't studied?
AISHA - Not at all. I mean, I had no idea the answers to those questions. But I was praying as I was taking it and I was asking God to take the exam for me. And I passed.

JESSICA - Wow.

AISHA - Crazy right?

(JESSICA notices ERIC walking outside past the window.)

JESSICA - Hey Aisha, let me run. I just remembered something I gotta do.

AISHA - Okay girl.

(JESSICA gets up and takes her tray.)

JESSICA thinks - Oh gosh, I gotta hurry!

(JESSICA almost drops the tray because she is rushing to get out.)

JESSICA thinks - Shoot!

(She casually walks out of the caf and turns to head toward the exit. As she nears the door, she unbuttons the top button of her shirt. She waits for a few seconds by the door.)

(silence)

(JESSICA walks out.)

JESSICA - Hey Eric!

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CALVIN notices that GWEN just took a pill when the waitress brought her water.

CALVIN - Hey. What's that pill for?

(silence)

GWENDOLYN - Oh nothing.

CALVIN - Nothing? It wasn't candy so I know it was for something.

(silence)

CALVIN - So you're not gonna tell me what that pill was for?
GWENDOLYN - No.

(CALVIN laughs.)

CALVIN - So you're into keepin' secrets huh?

GWENDOLYN - No, it isn't that. I just don't want to talk about it.

CALVIN - Fair enough. Let;s change the subject. Tell me something that you've done that is crazy. I told you my crazy throw up story.

GWENDOLYN - A lady doesn't have crazy stories like that.

CALVIN - Oh please! Yes yall do!

(GWENDOLYN laughs.)

GWENDOLYN - Okay we do. Aight this one time right...

(CALVIN smiles as GWEN begins her story.)

GWENDOLYN - I used to like this guy in high school.

CALVIN - Star football player?

GWENDOLYN - Nope.

CALVIN - Star basketball player?

GWENDOLYN - If you let me finish the story, I can tell you.

CALVIN - Ha ha ha ha, my bad.

GWENDOLYN - I don't like the athlete kind of guy. Or the star popular dude on campus. I never was into that. I like the person that most girls probably would pass over.

CALVIN - Uh huh.

GWENDOLYN - So I liked this guy. His name was Seymour.

CALVIN - Seymour! Ha ha ha ha ha!

GWENDOLYN - Yep! Seymoure Henry. Computer nerd!

CALVIN - God!

GWENDOLYN - So anyway, I guess I wanted to impress Seymour. I knew he liked computers so I tried to use a webcam and record a message to him. So me and my friend were trying to figure out the webcam all day long. We would use it, then try and watch it. Then it had a mistake, so we would do it again. We used disc after disc. Just wasteing em.

CALVIN - Uh huh.

GWENDOLYN - So finally, I had written down what I wanted to say to him and I had on my cute outfit. You know it took me forever to choose the right outfit.

CALVIN - Ha ha ha ha!
GWENDOLYN - So I had on my outfit and a little bit of makeup. And I recorded this message to Seymour and it was perfect! If my parents knew what I was doing they would've killed me because wasn't supposed to wear make up and I had ruined so many discs trying to record the message!

CALVIN - Okay.

GWENDOLYN - So the next day in school, I tell Seymour that I had worked on some assignment and I wanted him to take a look at it. He took it. I had to fight myself from smiling and try to look as serious as possible when I gave it to him.

CALVIN - Okay.

GWENDOLYN - Now I had butterflies like crazy trying to see what he would say once he opened it up.

CALVIN - So what did he say?
GWENDOLYN - Nothing! For a whole week! That was the longest week of my life!

CALVIN - What? He didn't give you any response for a week?
GWENDOLYN - He wouldn't even look in my direction for a week! So finally I gave in and approached him. I was like, hi Seymour. I was wonderig what you thought of the...assignment...that I gave you on that disc. You never got back to me about that.

CALVIN - Uh huh.

GWENDOLYN - So he pulls me aside and takes out his laptop. I was so impressed that he even had a laptop in high school!
CALVIN - Damn that's true! I don't even have one now! Ha ha ha ha!

GWENDOLYN - So he pulls out his laptop and runs my disc. I had given him the wrong one!

CALVIN - What!

GWENDOLYN - I must've mixed them up! But the one I gave him, I didn't even know the webcam was on!

CALVIN - Oh shit! So what did you give him?

(GWEN pauses in her story.)

GWENDOLYN - The webcam was on between me shooting. I didn't know it was on! So it was recording me talking to my friend about how much I liked Seymour and how I could picture us as husband and wife. Me cooking for him when he came home from a hard days work at the office.

CALVIN - Oh no!

GWENDOLYN - But that aint the worst part. While I was talking, I was trying on different outfits! Seymour got to see more of me then I bargained for!

CALVIN - Ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha!

GWENDOLYN - I stood there speechless as I watched myself change outfits, change bras, talk about Seymour, walk around in my panties, everything! So he let it play, ejected it and handed it to me. I didn't know what to say. So we stood there quiet, then he just packed his laptop up and bounced.

CALVIN - So did you ever get to explain to him the mix up?

GWENDOLYN - Explain? I avoied that boy from that day on! I didn't know who was more embarrased. Him or me!

CALVIN - Now that is a funny story!

(The waitress brings the wings over.)

GWENDOLYN - But my story aint go nothing on yours! Yuck!

CALVIN - Yeah I know. I got you on that one.

(They both take a wing and start eating.)

GWENDOLYN - But you know, I'm sure you got more stories for me.

CALVIN - Maybe.

(silence)

GWENDOLYN - I can think of one you can tell me.

CALVIN - Oh yeah? What's that?

(GWENDOLYN pauses as she swallows.)

GWENDOLYN - What made you want to pledge a Black fraternity?

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JESSICA walks out of the caf and coincidentally runs into ERIC.

JESSICA - Hey Eric!

ERIC - Hi Jess. What's goin' on girl?
JESSICA - Nothin' much. Just leaving lunch. What's up with you?
ERIC - Nothing much. I'm just leaving...

JESSICA thinks - Philosophy class.

ERIC - ...Philosophy class. I have a break until...

JESSICA thinks - Business management seminar.

ERIC - ...my business managament seminar class.

JESSICA - That's cool. What are you gonna do during your break?
ERIC - I was gonna walk back to the dorm.

JESSICA - Oh okay. We'll I'm goin' that way. You mind if I tag along?
ERIC - No problem.

(They begin to walk together.)

JESSICA - I could use the company actually. Someone to talk to.

ERIC - Oh yeah? Is something wrong?
JESSICA - Well...

(JESSICA pauses.)

JESSICA - ...remember my friend Valencia?
ERIC - Uh...

JESSICA - From back home? She's my best friend from high school.

ERIC - Oh Val.

JESSICA - Yeah. You remember her right?
ERIC - Sure. What about her?

JESSICA - Well she got mixed up with this guy and he's got her all open.

ERIC - What;s wrong with that?
JESSICA - Wait til you see this guy.

ERIC - He aint cute? I mean, maybe she likes him. Everybody can't be as pretty as the Nupes ya know! Ha ha ha ha!

JESSICA - Boy please. Aint nobody thinkin' bout yall!

ERIC - So what's wrong with her man?
JESSICA - It's hard to describe. You gotta just see him. But trust me, if you saw him, you would know what I mean! Her parents are about to put her out for dating him!

ERIC - They are! Why? Because of how he looks?
JESSICA - It isn't his...wait, you got a minute?
ERIC - Yeah I guess.

JESSICA - Come on up and I'll show you his picture. Then you'll see what I'm talking about.

(silence)

ERIC thinks - If Akina finds out that I went to...well I'll only be there for a second. And I know I aint doin' shit and I know Jess don't want me no more. What the hell?
ERIC - Aight cool. Make it fast though, I gotta get ready to head back up to campus to this management class.

JESSICA - It'll only take a minute. That's all.

(They walk into the dorm and head to the elevator.)

JESSICA - You are gonna trip when you see this dude!
ERIC - Let's see. I don't see what all the fuss is about.

JESSICA - You just wait.

(They reach JESSICA's floor and get off the elevator.)

JESSICA - Come on.

(JESSICA pulls out her keys and opens her door.)

JESSICA - Okay wait here. I'll go in the bedroom and get his picture.

ERIC - Okay.

ERIC thinks - See, I knew Jess didn't want me. She didn't even invite me in the bedroom! Ha ha ha ha.

(JESSICA goes into her room and starts to look around.)

JESSICA - Shit! I gotta find a picture of a guy! Some crazy lookin' guy!

(JESSICA starts to frantically look around.)

JESSICA thinks - Oh wait...this may work!

(She grabs a picture frame that she has never used. There is a generic picture of a white family in it now. She takes the picture out.)

JESSICA thinks - This is perfect!

(She quickly takes off her shirt and and grabs a t shirt in her hand. She walks back out in her bra.)

JESSICA - Wait til you see this dude E!

ERIC thinks - Oh shit! Why is Jess' shirt off?

(JESSICA hands ERIC the picture as she puts the little t shirt over her head. ERIC is staring at her breasts.)

JESSICA - Now you see what I mean?
ERIC - Huh?

(JESSICA pulls the shirt over her head and starts to fix her hair.)

JESSICA - Val's man. You see what I mean now?
ERIC - Oh...uh...uh...oh okay.

(ERIC looks at the picture.)

ERIC - Uh...wait, this is the guy?
JESSICA - Yes! This is a picture of him and his real family.

ERIC - Wait hold up. This white dude left his family and is messin' with Val?

JESSICA - Yep.

ERIC - You are lying!

JESSICA - Nope, see what I mean?
ERIC - Why didn't you just say he was an old married white guy? Shit! I understand totally now!

JESSICA - So it's kinda sad. Ya know? Because she loves him a lot and I see right through his bullshit.

ERIC - Damn.

JESSICA - And Val is my best friend in the world and I just hate to see her...

(JESSICA pauses.)

JESSICA - ...I hate to see her...

(JESSICA starts to choke up.)

ERIC - Are you okay?
JESSICA - I'm fine. It's just that...when you're friend is hurting...

(JESSICA starts crying and she covers her face in her hands.)

ERIC - Don't cry Jess. Val will be okay.

JESSICA - It's just that he's such...such...such a loser...and I love her...and...

(She starts to cry harder.)

ERIC - Jess...

(ERIC takes JESSICA's by the hand and pulls her close to him. He holds her close.)

ERIC - Shhhhh. Stop crying. Val will be alright okay. You just have to love her and be a good friend to her okay?

JESSICA - Uh huh.

ERIC - It's gonna be alright.

(JESSICA smiles as she squeezes ERIC back.)

JESSICA thinks - Oh I know. It's gonna be alright!